Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Back to Your Roots

(WARNING: This blog gets a little heavy on the gifs!)
I have been a student in the art field for years now. I have had the privilege of working with many very talented people, and I also go digging through different sites gazing at artistic eye candy. Through all this studying and searching I have found one thing that is a repetitive theme.

It is something I like to call a "Mid-Life Creative Crisis" even though they tend to happen
more then just once.

People, even students who have a passion for what they do, hit this imaginary roadblock in their head.
They start wondering why they are even doing what they are doing. 
Is it something they can do as a career, do they want to, is it what they thought it was?

I see it every term someone is questioning why they are even in the program. Why they
even are an artist.

Now confidence is not something that is unwavering in the artistic life. In fact
artist, writers, creative people in general are known for their
internal struggles with their own greatness. 

Add on to all the comments from haters in the world, social pressure, and teachers 
just telling you how it is. It wears on a person, even the best and most talented of people.

No reason to stress OUT!!!

Just take a step back and go back to your roots. When I am feeling doubtful about myself, 
or start to question why in the hell I am even doing this crap. I like to take a step back.

Sometimes I wander off the watch some anime or listen to some music just to increase my happy
mood, but when that does work I go a little farther. 

I do a project just for me, I just put pencil to paper and try to draw something I used to love
drawing. Even if it is corny, stupid, has awful composition, and would get my a grade of F.
I just draw it without holding any form on judgement in my head.

It helps to remind me why I started taking art classes.
Why I have subjected myself to endless years of constructive criticism.

So when you start questioning yourself, or start wondering why you are even
going through all this trouble. Shut down the world and look back to
how those first projects made you feel and just do something for you.

If after doing that you still have those doubts or feelings that you don't want to do this anymore, then 
maybe you should just move onto something else and give up on writing, drawing, ect. 

Either way you will have learned something.

Saturday, May 24, 2014


Yep, felt a little better this morning so I pushed through the annoyance, and even though there is one cosmetic problem with the nav bar I still uploaded the site.

Click the image above and head over to the new and improved website!

Friday, May 23, 2014

Bad Friday, Bad!!

My plan for today was to get my website up and running so I could make an awesome Friday post. Go Daddy has had other plans. While I am so very very very very close to finishing my website,

And we are talking like two lines of text and a header change.

Go Daddy's site builder only allows for four hours of bug free use, then it all goes to hell!
This leaves me with a very disappointing Friday and a list of new swear words.

I get creative when annoyed.

This just means you will all have to wait until Monday to see my new and beautiful site, until then 
 enjoy a new piece of artwork!

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Comic TREAT!!

It is now 2:30 am and I have officially turned in my last final. So now that that mess is all out of the way I promised everyone a special post today.
Now while I didn't get as much done this as I had wanted to you get the idea behind the story, and maybe one day I will actually clean it up some more and continue it. Who knows. Till then relax, enjoy, and read on!!!

Friday, May 16, 2014

Something for Your Friday

Still working on finals, two days and counting!!!! 
But that's not going to stop me giving you something to kick of your weekend. Another piece of written work from the folder of random crap sitting on my desktop.

Cries of endless battles rang out in the ghost of memories, filling the empty stone stadium with an ominous air. This was where it would happen. A grand battle waged between creatures, humans, demons, and in the end a victor. A glimpse of what the next generations of the mortal would have in store, it was a place were time, life, and even death stood still, and they called it holy. Placed high above the mortal world carved by angels, blessed by gods, and christened in blood..
            The stone carvings of angelic maidens bathed in nothing but their natural skin, towering high above a massive circular dirt pit littered with rumble. How many lives have those maidens taken to the beyond? How many fallen souls were transported by death's hand under their watch?
            I was sure it was countless. Some infinite number since the first creation of life in the world, maybe even far beyond that, it was hard to tell. The old familiar stones trembled under my feet. Even the aged magic that guarded this most sacred of lands knew of my past deeds. A life bathed in horrors that only the imagination of a seasoned teller could capture. Orange sun light bathed my skin in a golden glow, welcoming the warmth it was a delightful improvement over the cold shadows I had grown so accustom to.
“Why are you here?” the small boyish voice of an old foe asked from behind me.
            I had picked up his scent long before I heard him speak. Youth, summer wind, sweet lemon grass, and a naive air. There was only one person it could be. Ragnar.
“I was summoned,” I replied back, studying the wispy clouds that danced across the darkening sky. “Same as you. Though I do not understand why you were chosen.”
            The boy was useless. I had fought him years ago, granted he had no doubt grown since then, still that naive childish air hung around him like a dark, damning cloud.
“The gods believe in me, and the mortal realm is mine to protect.” he growled. I forgot quick to anger, his death would be even swifter. “That is what I am here to do. Protect my world from things like you.”
“I wouldn't worry your mind with her.” a thick, smoothing whisper of a voice called from the shadows to my left. I knew that voice as well, and though I only now sensed him it was all to familiar.
“You will not make it pass the first round.” the voice mocked as a tall slender, yet slightly defined young man appeared from the shadows. Hair of raven black, sink pale white, and eyes of silver.
            My red gaze settled on him as he looked beyond me Ragnar. Phant, the shadow of the dark realm, I had fought him many times, and even fought with him side by side on occasion. This would not be the case with the trails to come.
“Milady,” Phant said acknowledging me as he bowed, “so nice to be in your company once again.” Yes he was smooth as ever and still mocking me.
“Spare me Phant.” I brushed him off with my cold uncaring tone. Ragnar was not so easily pushed aside.
“What do you mean I won't last?!” he yelled finally stepping into the fading light. “My kin is more qualified to be in this test then any other.”
“Your kin is dead,” I reminded him folding my arms across my chest. “and you are nothing more then a faint echo of what they once were.”
            A fiery rage started to radiant from his aura, but he was hardly a threat of any kind.
“Phant, why are you here?” I finally asked. It was odd for me to be here, but even more so for Phant. He was a shadow dweller and I a shadow master. In a tournament such as this only one creature, person, being from each realm was chosen. Two from the same was very rare, in the two hundred millennia I had been taking part in the tournament.
“Maybe you are being classified as something else this time?” was all Phant offered as he shrugged his shoulders.
            It was a possibility, my classification of race was all over the darker realms.
“Well how do you classify something like you?” another male voice sounded from my left. A large, towering, muscular temple of a man laughed as he came closer. Long brown hair pulled back into a pony tail, with eyes of endless green. A smug smile plastered across his face, as his eyes traveled up and down my body.
“Lets see,” he started again stopping just to the side of me. His face scrunched up as if analyzing everything that went unseen about me. “Opsona elf, half vampire, part god, with a  demonic aura. Oh and a shadow caster. Did I leave anything out?”
“On top of things as usual Asher.” I replied back hardly giving him a glance.
            He leaned in closer, his demonic aura pushing outward to invade my space. A flash of dominance to show the others what he meant to claim. A futile show of power if I had ever witnessed one.
“How many others will there be?” Phant asked. I could sense the others appearing around the arena. Different auras from different classes of mortals, immortals, gods, dark creatures, light creatures, and everything that fell in between. A champion from every realm, and then I noticed something even more strange, or really disturbing was the term for it.
            Turning, I headed into a dark hallway that lead out of the arena.
“Where are you wandering off too, Myst?” Asher asked.
“I'm leaving,” I answered honestly, even if it was insane. “I will not be part of this massacre.”
“What does she mean leaving?” I heard Ragnar ask as I walked off into the shadows.
            You didn't simply leave the tournament when you were chosen. It was near impossible to go against the high powers that established the battles to come. This was off though, this was not a tournament arranged for the entertainment of the heavens. Every person chosen to take place had something to gain by my death. or rather the annihilation of my immortal soul. This event was called for me.

Till Sunday people, Enjoy your weekend and go see GODZILLA!!

Thursday, May 15, 2014


I must admit I am eyeballs deep in term papers, comic project, inking, coloring, final exams.
I had to jump on and post a thank you to all my fans! This little vault of internal insanity has made it to 3,000 views!

Love to everyone that visits my blog, and death by Gremlin cat to all others!

Remember check in Sunday for a special post!

Monday, May 12, 2014

Monday Treats! Shadow Gemini Update

I didn't get as much done as I wanted to his week. I am picky and tend to redo a page over and over again until it just clicks, and pure genius over takes me. However; I do have a very awesome cover to show off and some of the later pages that still need some work.

Check back Sunday for a special update!!
Till then!

Friday, May 9, 2014

Friday Writing Treat!!

I have been slaving away at my final project all week and I have just been itching to write something, anything, but I haven't the time.

So looking back at some of my old work I stumbled upon some more goodies from the past. Now I have reworked it a little, but it is still close to the way it was when I first laid pen to paper.

Enjoy the little treat and look for more of Shadow Gemini pages on Monday!!!

(written @ age 19/2004)

What a world we live in, born into uncertainty and yet nourished by the false belief that our paths are protected. Watched over by faceless deities that delight in our very creation. In truth this world is tragic, a game for every powerful being that ever looked down upon it. A place where noble rulers crumbled under the weight of shameful secrets, their young left to fight their senseless battles, and where youth is just a faded illusion. Because when you are called to the deities service there is no force able to alter density. Not even childhood innocence could halt the game of the gods, the cruel joke that mortals were created to fulfill along their preordained paths.
            Free will, a comforting thought, an illusion to bring hope to the hopeless, and it is I, the enforcer whom is responsible to see their fates play out. I watch every second of mortal time pass before me, and know how each path is to end. The game master who keeps the pawns in check. Free will, there was never such a thing until I granted it. I suppose that is why I have been condemned by my own kind. The pages of fate have been burned… Let the real game being.

To answer a few questions you might have about this passage... Yes it is the beginning of a bigger whole. Yes it is a story I have mostly written in first draft form only, and yes I remember it so maybe one day it will be revised and completed. :)
Till Monday People! Have a Great Weekend!

Monday, May 5, 2014

Monday Treats!

As has become a little bit of a habit I am going to share with you what I did over the weekend. Really I must say I did not get much done, but I did settle on a cover design for Shadow Gemini. So I do have that.

On another note I will be GONE!!

Yep, don't come looking for me this week. I am locking myself away to finish final projects this week so socializing is getting put on the back burner!
Awwww, don't cry I'll be back soon!